A dozen directors and managers from professional service firms joined me on the PM Forum’s “Developing your coaching and mentoring skills” experiential training session this week. http://www.pmforum.co.uk/training/  It was a great day – and we particularly enjoyed the role plays of coaching sessions with team members and fee-earners which provided both practice and insight.

The delegates’ top takeaways were as follows:

  1. Plan your coaching session – for example, use the GROW model for structure, gather specific examples and evidence of things you want to change and be clear about your goals
  2. Use empathy – take their perspective and focus on their concerns. And assess their emotional intelligence when working with others
  3. Accept difference – they may think, communicate, feel and behave in a different way to you so you need to understand and adapt to different styles
  4. Reframe negative labels – look for the positive intent behind any behaviour you perceive as negative, consider the strengths of such behaviour
  5. Move from expert/consultant mode to listening/learning mode – if you tell people to do things they are likely to resist
  6. Listen carefully – develop and practice your active listening skills to understand their needs. See the value in silence
  7. Ask questions – explore their concerns using their language and understand the value of different questioning techniques
  8. Empower people – help them discover that they have the knowledge and know the answers themselves
  9. Let them solve problems – use techniques such as the 3D method to help them answer their own questions
  10. Be patient – you may have ideas and advice but help them reach their own conclusions
  11. Check their understanding – when delegating, ask how they will start a task or what they perceive as the most challenging aspects
  12. Look beyond the mask – Some emotions and behaviour mark vulnerability

Key points from previous coaching skills sessions are shown here: http://kimtasso.com/seven-takeaways-coaching-skills-course-2014/

Some of the related blogs referred to during the session include: 

Psychology

http://kimtasso.com/psychology-business-communication-introduction-transactional-analysis-ta/

http://kimtasso.com/what-is-nlp-neuro-linguistic-programming/

http://kimtasso.com/the-psychology-of-creativity/

http://kimtasso.com/top-tips-on-the-psychology-of-persuasion/

http://kimtasso.com/psychology-neuroscience-and-client-engagement/

http://kimtasso.com/book-review-small-big-small-changes-spark-big-influence-steve-j-martin-noah-j-goldstein-robert-b-cialdini-persuasion-science/

http://kimtasso.com/book-review-emotional-intelligence-2-0-travis-bradberry-jean-greaves/

http://kimtasso.com/two-big-guns-of-communication-face-time-and-reframe/ 

Change management

http://kimtasso.com/change-management-book-review-switch-how-to-change-things-when-change-is-hard-by-chip-and-dan-heath/

http://kimtasso.com/change-management-in-a-surveyors-practice-bridging-the-gap-between-the-old-and-the-new/

http://kimtasso.com/reflections-on-managing-change-and-leadership/

http://kimtasso.com/be-more-strategic-creating-behaviour-change/

Goal setting

http://kimtasso.com/3-themes-from-marketing-planning-stepping-stones-persuasion-and-momentum/

http://kimtasso.com/set-goals-check-limiting-assumptions/

http://kimtasso.com/faq/how-do-you-increase-motivation-for-marketing-and-business-development/

Coaching and mentoring

http://kimtasso.com/career-coaching-counselling-kim-tasso/

http://kimtasso.com/personality-assessment-as-part-of-the-coaching-and-development-process/

http://kimtasso.com/boost-training-effectiveness-learning-theory-nutshell/

http://kimtasso.com/faq/how-can-i-improve-my-active-listening-skills/

http://kimtasso.com/coaching-and-mentoring-staff-and-fee-earners/

http://kimtasso.com/faq/how-can-coaching-help-partners-improve-their-business-development-performance/

Conflict management

http://kimtasso.com/nine-ideas-for-better-conflict-management/

http://kimtasso.com/book-review-conversational-riffs-creating-meaning-out-of-conflict-by-neil-denny/

http://kimtasso.com/10-practical-tips-fee-price-negotiations/